Electric Josh

Thursday, April 04, 2002

Hmmm. I had to leave work early because of a burrito. We returned hungry from a demo at a customer's site of our imminent "version 2", so I did the only logical thing and got a $3 "Big Veggie" burrito from the food trucks over by MIT. It was the perfect amount of food, but it obviously contained heavy sedatives because I almost immediately felt an overwhelming need to nap. I was able to get stuff done this afternoon only through heroic acts of caffeine consumption and painful bouts of thinking through the fog of bodily exhaustion. By 4:30, giving up and going home was the only option.

I'm becoming addicted to caffeine the way my mom is, where too little of the stuff causes headaches that threaten to end my day until the absence of the drug is remedied. From a public policy perspective, caffeine is probably the greatest drug ever invented because it's really cheap, so people don't start gang wars over it; it's a stimulant, so users contribute more effectively to gross domestic product or something; and withdrawal's only symptoms are getting incapacitating headaches and falling asleep cranky. But the stuff never really took, for me. I find, even now, in these beginning stages of complete dependence, that the stuff makes me twitchy like I haven't been since I was a teenager. It causes me to sweat a bit more than would be nice, and it fouls my breath in new and exciting ways.

Maybe getting the rest of the way into shape would help. So would having a somewhat regular schedule. It's not even that I mind being tired---I'm not in graduate school and I don't have kids---it's just that I don't want to be addicted to anything. The last few Sundays have been vaguely horrible because I haven't been able to figure out until well into the afternoon that the headache that by then has been creeping up on me throughout the day is because of withdrawal from a very annoying drug.

I wonder if coffee causes terrorism, too? #

...

I need a nap. #